So, my mother did not let me go to the LA county fair..so I was mad...so I started writing...And I haven't written in about a year..SO I need some advice/critique. Pleeeeaaase :D
“Cinderella! CINDERELLA!”
“Huh? Oh…what?” Cinderella steps out of bed, and looks around her room. She watches the window, waiting.
“Well come on now! Am I supposed to do my own hair now, Huh? Come on, you useless birds!”
“Well come on now! Am I supposed to do my own hair now, Huh? Come on, you useless birds!”
Cinderella gives up, and pins her own hair up. Now who would’ve thought birds were so unreliable?
Cinderella walks down stairs, to find her actually rather attractive stepsisters eating Cheerios, and Lucky Charms. Cinderella slumps to the pantry, and digs out a cherry Poptart.
They hear the doorbell ring, and the “evil” stepmother rushes in. The girls look expectantly at the door.
“Oh..No thank you! We’re renters…” the stepmother lies, trying to get rid of the solicitor, as she closes the door, “Just another carpet cleaner.”
“Mother, can we get a piz-“ Cinderella is interrupter by another knock at the door.
“I THOUGHT I TOLD Y..Oh, Hello there! A party you say? Why of course!” the stepmother says, as she closes the door, “Girls! Guess wha-“ The doorbell rings again.
“I HAVE NO INTEREST IN BECOMING A MORMON!” The Stepmother screams as she opens the door, expecting a missionary. She opens the door, and instead finds a chubby old lady, wearing a blue cape.
“Hey, Hi, Yes, hello. So, I’m ya Fairy GodMomma. You got wishes? I got the power to grant ‘em to ya. Hurry, though, it’s almost my cigarette break,” the Fairy Godmomma says, in a Jersey Accent.
“Oh! I’m sorry. The dysfunctional family you’re looking for is down the block,” the stepmother says cheerfully.
The Fairy GodMomma drives away on her jazzy, at the fast and furious speed of ½ mile per hour.
“What is the invitation to stepmother? Is it to a ball?” Cinderella asks.
“Pft! No! It’s to a rave, Cindy!” one of the stepsisters answer.
“Can we go Stepmother?!”
“Why of cour-“ the stepmother starts, but gets interrupted by Cinderella.
“Why of cour-“ the stepmother starts, but gets interrupted by Cinderella.
“I HAVE TO GO! I MUST! Or I shall die alone with 37 cats at my side!” Cinderalla whines.
“I said you could g-“
Cinderella interrupts again, “Why do you hate meee? Why must I go to unsanitary rodents for my affection?!” Cinderella starts to cry, and she runs upstairs.
“Well that was melodramatic,” one of the stepsisters say.
“Well, how about you two go get ready for the party, and I’m going to go find Cinderella,” the stepmother replies.
That night, Cinderella, and the stepsisters set off for the ball in a, you guessed it, squash!
“Cinderella, did we have to go in another vegetable?” the stepsisters whine in unison, “How come we couldn’t get a limo, like everybody else?”
“Because I’m a vegetarian, okay?” Cinderella snaps.
They arrive at the party. Lights and smoke can be seen from the outside. They walk inside, and they all cough, due to it’s very smoker-friendly lounge.
“Come here often?” A sleazy guy yells across the room at Cinderella. Cinderella runs away, and accidently steps out of her shoe.
“OH NO! What ever shall I do? Think Cindy…Think….I had my shoe, now I don’t. Leave it! That’s what I should do!” Cinderella leaves the shoe, and a pimple-faced young man grabs it.
Cinderella, and her stepsisters end up spending the night at the rave, due to drunken stupor. The next morning, they wake up, and look around at all the trash, and glitter dumped all over the floor.
“Who invited Ke$ha to the party?” Cinderella asks, picking herself up, and getting ready to walk home.
“Wait! Cindy! Why don’t we take the squash home?”
“Oh..yeah…I ate it…and then set some on fire…and then I ate that too…it felt like a good idea at the time…it still feels like a good idea,” Cinderella says, stumbling around, “You know, you were always my best friend!” She mumbles, and slowly passes out again. The stepsisters drag her the rest of the way home.
At home, the doorbell rings, and in steps the pimple-faced young man.
“I saw you at the party, and you looked desperate, and drunk, and those are the traits I need in my women,” he says, as he snorts, and pushes up his glasses.
“I want the nerd!”
“NO, I want the nerd!”
“No, I DO!”
All three sisters get in a fight, and the nerd, and the stepmother just watch.
“Now that’s hot,” the nerd says, “Ladies, Ladies, No need to fight! I’m a polygamist! There enough of me to go around.”
“Yay!”
All of a sudden, Cinderella vomits up the burning squash, and the drapes are set on fire. The fire travels, and goes throughout the whole house. Nobody survives!
